The Hooker Story

This story almost didn't happen, because I was suppose to go Amsterdam, and I really had no intention to go to Prague. However, Amsterdam didn't come through, and I decided to go to Prague, since I got nothing else to do. This turned out to be a great decision. It took a long time to get there, but Prague is such a beautiful city. I didn't know this going in, but Prague is one of the top party cities in the world. I was so glad that I came. We did normal tourist stuff during the day, and when the sun fell, we were really to head out.

We stopped by a bar first, and I had absinthe for the first time. It was delicious, not at all strong, and a great way to start off my night. Let's keep count of how much I drank. This is a double shot of about 70% alcohol, so 4. Then I ordered a double shot of some random vodka, so 6. I also ordered a B52 shot, 7 finished half of long island ice tea, so 8. This was only the bar.

We walked to a club, paid the cover, and walked in. It was the best club I have ever been to, no joke. There are five stories: each story had its over theme, music, and lighting. It was so awesome. Nothing too exciting happened at a club, we danced, stopped some creepy dudes from hitting on our friends. At around 4AM, the club closed and we started to walk back to our hostel. While I was in the club, I had 3 long island ice tea, and 4 tequila shots, so 15.

When we were about half way back, a random girl walked up to me; she put one hand on my crotch and started rubbing and other hand on my ass. Due to the amount of alcohol I consumed, I did not realize what she was. I just put my arm around her and enjoyed the free handjob. I just continued to talk to my friends like nothing was happening.

However, my friends started pushing her away. The only thought going through my head was "What the fuck did I do to you guys? Why are you doing this to me? This is cockblocking, literally." I don't remember if I actually asked what they were doing, I just remember I was a bit ticked off. Then, one guy pretended to be my boyfriend and told the girl that I was gay and she should leave.

By now, I finally realized that she was a hooker, and I was thinking straight enough to realize that I do not want to do a hooker, because one, she is a hooker, and two, I have no money in my wallet. I wasted everything on alcohol that night, about 50 dollars. I started to play along as being gay, and another friend came up and kissed me on the cheeks, just in case she needed more proof.

I also tried to push her away; I aimed for her shoulders, but without coordination and motor skills, I missed my target, I was a little low and toward the middle. You guessed, I pushed on her boobs. And they were pretty nice.

Thus end my night and my one and only encounter with a prostitution. What can I say about this experience? Hookers are real people who are just trying to make a living. They are not always ugly hoes; this one was pretty good looking with a pretty good body. All I want to say is, unless you are extremely desperate, don't do a hooker. But if you are, remember that you might be helping to feed her 5 children.